Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
