dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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