I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize
