You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
