How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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