It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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