Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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