She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
