I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
