Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
