she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Houston, we have a blender
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
