let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Randomize
