you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
