everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Randomize
