Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
