I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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