Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
