Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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