Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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