Welp...herpes.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
