Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
