I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize