do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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