we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize