I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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