why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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