just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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