Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
