Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Houston, we have a squirter
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I pour the whiskey from now on
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize