i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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