You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Panties = found
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
