i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
