Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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