...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
