oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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