that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
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