Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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