I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
