Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
