Don't you send me to vm
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
