With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
