Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
