Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
