I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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