small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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