Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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