Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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