Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
