Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Alive.
So much puke
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
