So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
