Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
