ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
